A Day At The Comic Con
by lunatroid
Summary: Cosmo and Wanda give their creator a lesson on How Married People Should Behave. This is satire, please read and review it as such. It made ME feel better, anyway.


This is more of a vent than a fan fiction. But it sure was fun to write. FYI, Butch Hartman really did say in a real-life interview that he thinks of his show "The Fairly Oddparents" as being a "G-rated Simpsons".  
Also FYI, I don't own "The Fairly Oddparents" and am getting nothing but a great sense of personal satisfaction from writing this. FOP is owned by Nickelodeon.

(The scene is a comic convention. A reporter, microphone in hand, approaches an artists' table set up for display. It is surrounded by a glut of posters, standups and banners depicting a white-haired teenager with glowing green eyes and a single small poster of a pair of fairies. Sitting behind it is a dark-haired man, ready to sign autographs from fans.)

REPORTER: Are you Butch Hartman?  
HARTMAN: That's me! Are you a Danny Phantom fan?  
REPORTER: Uh, well, actually I'm here to interview you about your show "The Fairly Oddparents".  
HARTMAN: Oh. That.  
REPORTER: I'm Bill Quill, from Animation Fascination Magazine, and I'd like to ask you why you think "The Fairly Oddparents" was such a success.  
HARTMAN: Well, Bill, I credit mycast _danny phantom_, mycrew _danny phantom_, and mywriters _danny phantom_.  
REPORTER: Uh, okay. Why don't you give us some background on "The Fairly Oddparents"?  
HARTMAN: Well, it's about this kid _danny phantom_ named Timmy Turner _danny phantom_ who had these fairy godparents _danny_ _phantom_ named Cosmo and Wanda _danny phantom_!  
(Reporter stares at Harman in silence for a moment)  
REPORTER: You created another show, didn't you?  
HARTMAN: Oh, well, heh-heh, I wasn't going to bring it up, but since you mention it…(speaks very rapidly) It's this totally-cool-totally-popular-so-NOT-a-waste-of-money I call…  
(does a Mr. Crocker-like spazz)  
**DANNY PHANTOM!**  
REPORTER: Uh, right. If we could get back to "The Fairly Oddparents" for a moment…  
HARTMAN: (does another spazz) **AND IT'S NOT CANCELLED!  
**REPORTER: Mr. Hartman, we were talking about "The Fairly Oddparents"…?  
HARTMAN: Oh, right! Well, you see, Bill, I've always thought of "The Fairly Oddparents" as a G-rated "Simpsons"…  
(_**POOF!**_ Suddenly the two figures on the fairy poster come to life)  
WANDA: HAH!  
COSMO: WE WISH!  
(HARTMAN turns around and glares at them. The REPORTER, who can't see Cosmo and Wanda, looks warily at HARTMAN)  
HARTMAN: And what's that supposed to mean!  
WANDA: We mean that unfortunately we're NOT like "The Simpsons"! Marge never calls her husband a moron and an idiot!  
COSMO: Yeah! And Homer never calls Marge fat or ugly or naggy!  
HARTMAN: Whatever! It'sfunny! (chuckles)  
WANDA: (to Cosmo) Oh, listen to him.  
COSMO: I know. Blah, blah, blah…  
WANDA: (to Cosmo) I'm glad we don't really feel that way about each other, puddin'.  
COSMO: You know it, baby!  
(WANDA and COSMO start to kiss)  
HARTMAN: **HEY!** Cut that out you two! Adults watch our show! So that means no kissing or flirting or acting happily married. Adults hate that!  
REPORTER: Mr. Hartman, are you talking to a poster?  
HARTMAN: I'm trying to! BUT THEY WON'T LISTEN!  
REPORTER: (to himself) He's losing it…  
WANDA: But Homer and Marge kiss!  
COSMO: Not to mention_**they getto sleep in the same bed!**_  
HARTMAN: **NO!** Adult humor means insults and putdowns and woman-bashing! That's how I write it! And what I have written stays written!  
(spazzes) **DANNY PHANTOM!**  
(WANDA and COSMO stare at their creator)  
WANDA: Fine.  
(she and COSMO face off)  
COSMO: Gee, Wanda, you sure have a fat, um…(looks at Wanda's tiny body)…er…uh…(looks at her head, points at it) BRAIN!  
WANDA: Oh, yeah? How'd you like a fat _lip_, buster? (She waves her wand and turns her mouth into a huge pair of puffy pink lips)  
Namely, mine! (She gives Cosmo a big fat kiss)  
COSMO: (dazedly) Yes, please!  
HARTMAN: NOOOO! Sinful! Forbidden! Blasphemous! Fornication!  
(HARTMAN runs away foaming and raving, then lets loose one last spazz)  
**DANNY PHANTOM!  
**REPORTER: (sighs) Oh, well, I wonder where the "Ben 10" booth is… (he wanders off)  
(WANDA and COSMO collapse in laughter)  
WANDA: Now THAT was funny! (laughs)  
COSMO: Yeah! (spazzes) **DANNY PHANTOM!**  
(they laugh harder)  
WANDA: (wipes away a tear) Ah, don't you just love overly-ambitious hypocritical posers?  
COSMO: Yeah…  
(they both calm down, take deep breaths, and sigh)  
COSMO: They're so clueless!

THE END


End file.
